This is dedicated to all my Crushes...the ones that continue to hurt me to this day, but I can't let them go...


Crush...
Why did I feel so strong for you...
It's not love...
But somehow I still get the blues...
When you ignore me...
Or my feelings...
Because I let my heart out...
I was ready and Willing...
To let you in...
Because I wanted you to be so bad...
But it's funny because...
Everytime I have a...
Crush...
There seems to be one problem...
Me...
I hate that they have either ignored me...
Ripped my emotions to pieces with their harsh words...
Or played with my emotions and mind...
Damn I'm too kind...
Should I toughen up...
What's the problem...
Is it my looks...
I'm dying here...
Because I know that love...
Is something I won't be able to share...
With who...
The invisible man...
He don't want me too...
It's so hard to like someone so much...
And develope that SERIOUS crush...
All because you feel too hard and too much...
Just...
To be hurt in the end...
And to pretend like it didn't ruin your world...
Why must I live this continuously...
Why do I have to be that girl...?

I've wrote so many...4 page letters...
Just to have them unread...
I've been so emotionally scarred...
And ALWAYS left for dead...
I dread when I have a crush and can't seem to let them go...
Because I know...
That together...
We would never go...
So saddened by the days I am ignored,
I cry at night because of those unspoken words...
Even If you don't like me say it...
Please...
Because anythings better than not being told at all...
That's when I really fall...
Into that deressed state of mind...
I am too kind...
And if I wasn't...
This poem wouldn't have to be written...
I didn't think it mattered so much...
Being and staying a virgin...
I'm just not the one to try to fit in...
And regret it in the end...
Man I'm torn...
Because every crush I've had...
Has hurt me...
And hurt me hard.